Metal Warfare - Irish Metal Forum

Metal Discussion => Metal Discussion => Topic started by: Hambeast on December 10, 2018, 01:09:04 PM

Title: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Hambeast on December 10, 2018, 01:09:04 PM
You know the drill. Post terrible album covers you've come across. Bonus points if the music is actually good!

Scanner - Hypertrace (Great album!)

(https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CRmW09GRABU/Utm7MBMouVI/AAAAAAAACXU/2ztxVUW7V1I/s1600/Front.jpg)

Lunar - Cosmogonal Perplexity

(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a0353937547_10.jpg)

Bal-Sagoth - Demo

(https://3.bp.blogspot.com/_t8Qvl1g7NKQ/TT44yMXt_eI/AAAAAAAAAIg/APXMPshZmik/s640/demo.jpg)

Riot - Narita

(https://img.discogs.com/_6pNTqCkbD9SYuHmw7wFkTx2lAY=/fit-in/600x599/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(90)/discogs-images/R-9069213-1474218648-6395.jpeg.jpg)

Pantera - Metal Magic

(https://i.redd.it/s2qxct9z6p401.jpg)

I also feel like a lot of Iron Maiden's CGI album covers belong here. They look like screenshots from The Sims

(https://imagesaws.juno.co.uk/full/CS653204-01A-BIG.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Juggz on December 10, 2018, 01:32:44 PM
Feast your eyes, feast until you go blind

https://bandcamp.com/tag/judas-priest

(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a0491120093_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a3864067464_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a0507037481_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a3779186046_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a0536012982_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a2212161996_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a2877492335_16.jpg)
(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a2135830460_16.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Trev on December 10, 2018, 01:44:07 PM
Those Hammer King and Scrollkeeper ones aren't really that bad
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Juggz on December 10, 2018, 01:47:21 PM
Ah lad.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Trev on December 10, 2018, 01:51:06 PM
Oh they're definitely not good either! But not out of the ordinary bad
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Anvil on December 10, 2018, 03:01:33 PM
Scanner - Hypertrace is an amazing album and Dance of Death has its moments.  I'm going to check out that Scrollkeeper album...if this thread was a shop and that was vinyl, I'd have bought it by now  :laugh:
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Barbaricdestroyer on December 10, 2018, 06:21:12 PM
(//)]
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Ollkiller on December 10, 2018, 08:49:25 PM
Some beauties in there. I dont know what the fuck is going on in that Riot-Narita one and I'm not sure that I want to know.  Can't stop laughing at the Bal Sagoth-demo one. It's gold.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Anvil on December 10, 2018, 09:11:33 PM
Quote from: Ollkiller on December 10, 2018, 08:49:25 PM
Some beauties in there. I dont know what the fuck is going on in that Riot-Narita one and I'm not sure that I want to know.  Can't stop laughing at the Bal Sagoth-demo one. It's gold.

It is like a bad tribute to some of Budgie's album covers.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: PANAYOTOU on December 10, 2018, 10:31:32 PM
One of the contenders for AOTY
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Hambeast on December 11, 2018, 12:16:35 AM
Looks like an episode of South park
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: DeadGoon on December 15, 2018, 01:34:34 PM
Hilarious album, poor art job

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3gvfcnjPnE
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Mithrandir on December 15, 2018, 07:45:08 PM
Has to be one of the worst ever?
(https://i.imgur.com/Bcdlr34.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Hambeast on December 19, 2018, 03:31:00 PM
Came across this bad boy earlier

(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a1838860416_10.jpg)

Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Trev on December 19, 2018, 05:01:56 PM
 :laugh: The skull codpiece needs to make a resurgence!
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Juggz on December 29, 2018, 10:06:58 PM
Truly shite, but the way the guy with the red V is pasted in at an angle - so his centre of gravity is way over his right leg, meaning he would go on his snot on the ground - that's what annoys me the most

(https://forum.metalwarfare.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fbravewords.com%2Fmedias-static%2Fimages%2Fnews%2F2019%2Fbloodbytimescddec.jpg&hash=6eccbd73644fdc6e3e494a6b81143f4cfe7fae6e)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: livingabortion on February 04, 2019, 02:00:13 AM
(https://mariskalrock.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/Comparativa-portadas-KISS-Anthrax-Rock-and-roll-over-kings-among-scotland.jpg)


Anthrax doing a shitty knock off of a Kiss  album cover. The Kiss one came out over 40 years ago and it still looks better. The Anthrax one just look bland and boring. Some of them look unrecognizable too.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Ducky on February 04, 2019, 07:39:34 PM
It's one of my favourite records of all time, but naked lads getting milled off a mountain? 'sake.

(https://www.metal-archives.com/images/6/1/8/618.jpg?1243)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: polymer on February 05, 2019, 08:52:15 AM
Quote from: Mithrandir on December 15, 2018, 07:45:08 PM
Has to be one of the worst ever?
(https://i.imgur.com/Bcdlr34.jpg)

...or one of the best  ;D
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Pentagrimes on February 05, 2019, 10:12:46 AM
This is shite

(https://shop.ironbonehead.de/13547-thickbox_default/urfeind-ger-swartaz-dagana-cd.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Don Gately on February 05, 2019, 01:39:54 PM
Quote from: Hambeast on December 19, 2018, 03:31:00 PM
Came across this bad boy earlier

(https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a1838860416_10.jpg)

That looks eerily like a tranny I banged once
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Cryptic Stench on February 05, 2019, 01:42:51 PM
Take your pick..........

www.sevared.com

Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: The Heretic on February 14, 2020, 12:59:41 PM
(https://rockntipo.com/240829-thickbox_default/comprar-cd-online-dirty-shirley-dirty-shirley.jpg)

hard to believe that's from the year 2020?
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Goatlord on February 14, 2020, 01:20:40 PM
Never actually noticed the blokes on the Sound of perseverance before
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: John Kimble on February 14, 2020, 02:54:36 PM
On a bit of a Pantera nostalgia buzz at the moment and gave Reinventing the Steel a few spins as it was definitely my least listened to album of theirs. Prob due to the fact that I never have it that much attention, it only really dawned on me how absolutely fucking scutter the album cover is. Everything about it is utter shit. The stupid junkie looking redneck in his trunks, and the blurred out bottle of presumably whiskey in his hand. Rubbish.
(https://forum.metalwarfare.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F3.bp.blogspot.com%2F-Y0qqsiA3zws%2FUUsJIwtZMxI%2FAAAAAAAAhzE%2FPP6S6UwJBX4%2Fs1600%2FHorns%2BUP%2BRocks%2BPantera%2BReinventing%2BThe%2BSteel%2BCover.jpg&hash=7c82122c2a75c4309c32ae6939f07e1c2c844164)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: ResidentOfBok on February 14, 2020, 03:00:36 PM
Quote from: Ducky on February 04, 2019, 07:39:34 PM
It's one of my favourite records of all time, but naked lads getting milled off a mountain? 'sake.

(https://www.metal-archives.com/images/6/1/8/618.jpg?1243)

Yeah it's a funny one that, it's a pretty awful cover despite being a great record. I kind of overlook the detail on the cover (maybe because it's so poorly rendered) and just treat it as a kind of blurry mountain.

A bit like The Shadowthrone, I just see this semi-blurry shape and instantly connect it with amazing music, so it's never bothered me.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Paul keohane on February 14, 2020, 03:04:20 PM
I have to say i never noticed the men either!
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Ducky on February 14, 2020, 03:14:07 PM
It's doubly awful when you consider how good the preceding six sleeves were. Some of those are flat out iconic.

The 20th anniversary edition has is much better in its execution, but the awful concept remains.

(https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51%2BQA%2BGzEDL.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Kurt Cocaine on February 14, 2020, 03:37:00 PM
What was that album cover of some oiled up dude naked with a hard-on?
He looked to be standing on some Arizona desert highway. Ridiculous... Hahaha....
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Paul keohane on February 14, 2020, 04:03:56 PM
Immolations -Here in After was 24 years old during the week,i still rate that as one of the best album covers of all time.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Ducky on February 14, 2020, 05:16:36 PM
Quote from: The Heretic on February 14, 2020, 12:59:41 PM
(https://rockntipo.com/240829-thickbox_default/comprar-cd-online-dirty-shirley-dirty-shirley.jpg)

hard to believe that's from the year 2020?

I can't stop looking at this. It's like a screen shot from a bad Sims expansion.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: ResidentOfBok on February 14, 2020, 05:36:51 PM
Quote from: Kurt Cocaine on February 14, 2020, 03:37:00 PM
What was that album cover of some oiled up dude naked with a hard-on?
He looked to be standing on some Arizona desert highway. Ridiculous... Hahaha....

Nigel Peppercock - Fresh white Reeboks kickin your ass. Google at your peril!
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Juggz on February 14, 2020, 05:48:18 PM
Quote from: John Kimble on February 14, 2020, 02:54:36 PM
On a bit of a Pantera nostalgia buzz at the moment and gave Reinventing the Steel a few spins as it was definitely my least listened to album of theirs. Prob due to the fact that I never have it that much attention, it only really dawned on me how absolutely fucking scutter the album cover is. Everything about it is utter shit. The stupid junkie looking redneck in his trunks, and the blurred out bottle of presumably whiskey in his hand. Rubbish.
(https://forum.metalwarfare.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F3.bp.blogspot.com%2F-Y0qqsiA3zws%2FUUsJIwtZMxI%2FAAAAAAAAhzE%2FPP6S6UwJBX4%2Fs1600%2FHorns%2BUP%2BRocks%2BPantera%2BReinventing%2BThe%2BSteel%2BCover.jpg&hash=7c82122c2a75c4309c32ae6939f07e1c2c844164)
Every cover they had, apart from Vulgar and FBD (not the farmer insurance crowd) was fucking terrible.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: DeletedUsermNqGIiIuGy on February 14, 2020, 07:31:38 PM
They really did have some shite album covers.  https://music.singemfrc.com/artist/pantera.htm

The RTS one the guy is actually naked in it and the shorts were overlayed.  The inlay picture back then just looked so weird and forced ..

(https://art.singemfrc.com/reinventingthesteel-inlay.jpg)

Given all the shit going on within the band at the time.. I dunno

Rex looks like he's forcing a smile while taking a shit. 
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Hambeast on February 14, 2020, 07:40:52 PM
Quote from: Kurt Cocaine on February 14, 2020, 03:37:00 PM
What was that album cover of some oiled up dude naked with a hard-on?
He looked to be standing on some Arizona desert highway. Ridiculous... Hahaha....

Nigel Pepper Cock. Back cover is even better
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Ducky on April 02, 2020, 07:20:12 PM
Stuck on Nevermore's "The Politics of Ecstasy" there, it's easily the best of their earlier albums, but the cover looks like the budget for the album was down to the last fiver and they still wanted money left over for a bag of chips.

(https://img.discogs.com/JndhCVo3XGiNloN5o_I7mWbQVZY=/fit-in/600x600/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(90)/discogs-images/R-754718-1515522253-9203.jpeg.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Thorn on April 03, 2020, 02:32:29 AM
haha, yeah it's a shocker alright but a superb album
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: kiehozero on April 03, 2020, 11:40:23 AM
The Dance of Death cover that was posted early on has not aged well at all. Looks like the cover of a Dreamcast RPG game.

Not going to post it at the risk of getting banned but Virgin Killers from Scorpions is another level of horrific. Google if you dare, and aren't on a work computer.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Ducky on April 03, 2020, 12:27:05 PM
Wasn't Dance of Death supposed to be a rough draught and Harris was all "bang tidy mate, we'll use that"?

And it was done by Dave Patchett, the same guy that did all of Cathedral's fucking cool sleeves?
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Eoin McLove on April 03, 2020, 12:40:08 PM
I think the Cathedral covers are cuntish too.  I hate the style.  It looks so rigid and inorganic.  Total crap.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: astfgyl on April 03, 2020, 03:17:30 PM
(https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/515vtKfcgeL._SX355_.jpg)

Gary is responsible for a lot of very bad covers but this is right up there. The face he is making is surely the same face he made when he saw the finished product.

Of the other ones there, Reinventing The Steel is truly awful and fits the terrible music very well. Every element of that release screams out that their hearts weren't in it at all.

And here is another that belongs in every bad cover thread

(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcTTDyQV_Jy40dwUorFw1Ef7caBGsAPaTmgovWAP8FVRC__FKY19&usqp=CAU)

Still haven't figured what the fuck is going on there. Class album though from another lad who is fond of shit album covers
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Trev on April 03, 2020, 03:35:18 PM
Quote from: astfgyl on April 03, 2020, 03:17:30 PM

And here is another that belongs in every bad cover thread

(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcTTDyQV_Jy40dwUorFw1Ef7caBGsAPaTmgovWAP8FVRC__FKY19&usqp=CAU)

Still haven't figured what the fuck is going on there. Class album though from another lad who is fond of shit album covers
Yeah that's always confused me. I'm an absolute Devin fanboy but the artwork has always seemed a bit of an afterthought. A few terrible ones, most are just serviceable,  but never anything brilliant. Terria is probably the best of the lot
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Carnage on April 03, 2020, 04:07:00 PM
I quite like the Ocean Machine cover (it's a machine coming out of the ocean, innit?), odd as it is. Better than the Infinity one anyway.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: astfgyl on April 03, 2020, 06:17:19 PM
Agree on Terria being the best of his. Toss up between that and Ocean Machine for his best music for me as well. Although City has a special place in my heart. Love the front cover of City as well actually. The original one. Not so keen on the newer versions.

And I know it's a machine coming from the Ocean but it's done in the shittest possible way
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: yknaa on April 03, 2020, 07:43:37 PM
This from Priest is just dire. Also any album with a skull and bat wings is just lazy. Primal Fear being the latests to try and pass it off.
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: Mower Liberation Front on April 03, 2020, 09:55:06 PM
(https://img.discogs.com/fNka5RRCKzmdACNRPu2yCUDh0VM=/fit-in/600x600/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(90)/discogs-images/R-12941134-1544980822-1889.jpeg.jpg)
Title: Re: Shitty Album Covers
Post by: astfgyl on April 04, 2020, 03:36:15 PM
....some patchy rain and drizzle with a chance later in the day of strong winds and polar bear attacks. Some icy mountain passes may also experience thunderstorms and flying beasts and motorists are advised to exercise caution when cornering at high speeds.