Return of THE FEAR!

[Ollkiller]

Aye welcome back Donal. I think you put up a story (might have been someone else) about how you had the fear so much one day after drinking you started crying when the postman rang the doorbell. That old thread was gold.

[Dark Stranger]

I must tell that story too, it's particularly pathetic. 

[The Butcher]

Went to Vegas 13 years ago, 12 of us go. About 3 lads went that I didn't know at all. One of them I could tell was a disaster waiting to happen.

Every morning we'd meet at Earl of Sandwich for some breakfast. One of the mornings we arrive there 8am (timezone still fecking with us)
and he's already there, conked asleep with a Dublin jersey, one oversized UFC glove on and an empty bottle of Bacardi beside him ->



We all just sat around him and ate breakfast while he was comatose - then everyone got up and left. I checked - he was breathing, I tell him the plan for the day and he grunts a few times in acknowledgement not once raising the noggin. 

3 hours later he resurrects and goes full hog at the yard drinks (think huge slushies with plenty of spirits chucked in) ->



He then disappears for most of the afternoon - We booked P.F.Changs for dinner before we had head out for the night. He shows up late and whispers the order into the bemused waiters ear. He walks in with the biggest cheesiest grin which seems to be taking most of his energy as he was struggling to keep his eyes even half open.

Once he sits down - He doesn't speak a word and just sinks into the booze netherworld. 15 minutes later his dish is placed down, everyone else is in good spirits chatting away while he's staring like a zombie at his plate. I was expecting projectile vomit at any moment he looked that bad.

"Cul, you alright? You haven't said a word and you haven't touched your lettuce wraps."

"Toilet." he mumbles. Everyone quietens down to try hear what he just said.

"Wha? Speak up Cul!"

"Need...the toilet." He gets up and leaves. He isn't seen for the rest of the night.

We see him the next day with a black eye and a big busted lip.

"What the hell happened to you?"

"I got robbed."

"Where? By who?"

Cul shakes and holds his head then proceeds to finger wag at his friend.

His friend that was staying with him in the same room begins to explain that he saw Cul chatting to police at half 5am in the morning outside the hotel room when he was coming back from the night out.

A curious lady of the night took interest in poor aul drunken Cul down at the casino, brought him back to his hotel room, while he was undressing she took all the cash out of his wallet and she proceeded to leave, he runs with his pants half the way down, tries to blocks the door but she hits him twice with her long doxy stilettos bursting open his lip and she escapes to victory.

Luckily for Cul - the police were able to recoup his money because she made the silly mistake of staying in the same hotel on a different floor so they were able to track her movements with CCTV. Unfortunately for Cul the last night while waiting for a taxi to get back into the strip, he decided to jump over a bush Jackass style and landed fully on his face against the corner of the pavement, busting open his lip again. After that trip we never saw or chatted to Cul again. Probably the best for all concerned!

[Dark Stranger]

    

[Caomhaoin]

It's so good I'll come back

[Thorn]

 

[Ollkiller]

Glorious  😄

[StoutAndAle]

Absolutely tremendous!